The worst movie I have ever seen!

The worst movie I have ever seen! 

You know that feeling that you get when you walk out of a movie theater and all you can say is "wow." It's a feeling that we all love, and frankly speaking is becoming more and more common these days with new special effect technology and the wide array of talented actors and actresses coming out. So when you do find the occasional movie that falls just a little short of great it catches you off guard. Well Cirque du Freak is the kind of movie that will not only catch you off guard, but also probably knock you off your chair and leave you confused for several minutes.  The original book is by Darren Shan, and with it’s exciting plot and many twists throughout the story, it’s one that is easy to expect a “wow” reaction from. At last that’s the expectations that I had when I first saw it. Well I soon figured out that my expectations were set WAY too high for this one.

            The movie depicts the main character, Darren, as a nerdy schoolboy, when in reality he is described in the book as the soccer star at his school and as having a lot of friends. Over a 12 book series Darren is found battling vampires and narrowly escaping death by his “athletic ability” but the Darren Shan depicted in the movie more closely resembles the kid who is picked last at recess. other main character is Mr. Crepsley, a vampire that travels with a freak show, and he too is depicted much different in the film than he was portrayed in the book. In the book Mr. Crepsley is led on to be a scary looking, intimidating vampire, but once you see the movie you’ll find Mr. Crepsley as a orange haired softy who judging by his appearance works on the side as a birthday party clown. It’s really hard throughout the movie to take this “vicious bloodsucking monster” serious when really the only thoughts that come to mind when you see him is of “Sunshine the clown” from your fifth birthday party.

            Have you ever tried filming a movie in your back yard? Did you involve any stunts? I’m guessing it didn’t turn out like the fight scenes in Lord of the Rings or Harry Potter. No worries, you’d be hired by the filming crew of “Cirque Du Freak” in a second. The fighting scenes are bad enough with a clown and a schoolboy dancing around, but when you add special effects on what seem to be done on an old PC at your grandparent’s house, the outcome isn’t exactly “Wow.” It’s quite the opposite, and results more often than not, in either returning the movie, or regretting your purchase.

            I guess the final reason why this movie is the worst movie that I have ever seen is that it is two hours long! The average human being would have trouble handing this movie if it was a 30 minute TV program, but the fact that it is two hours long, just gives you an excuse to pop it in, sit back and have a nice nap, because trust me, you won’t want to watch the full two hours.

            Very simply, take my word for it. Cirque Du Freak is bad enough with the poor portrayal of the real characters in the book, but when you add in the less than professional special effects it’s a movie that if used for anything, should be used for punishments for kids that don’t behave. And with it being two hours long, you’re kids aren’t going to be acting up anytime soon after seeing this movie.

I mean look at that hair!!